My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. I
couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so
they gave me the axe.
Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
Then, I tried to be a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life,
but I just didn't have the thyme.
My best job was being a Musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my
net income.
I managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the
work was just too draining.
After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a
Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working in Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always
the same old grind.
---------------------------------------------------
"Forty-three percent of all Americans say that immigration is a serious
problem.
The other 57 percent said, 'No hablo Ingles'.
---------------------------------------------------
A wife says she wants a divorce.
Husband: "But you're supposed to love me no matter what."
Wife: "You have me confused with Jesus."
---------------------------------------------------
Some children's bible interpretations:
Lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during the
night.
The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
The people who followed the lord were called the 12 decibels.
The epistels were the wives of the apostles.
Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.
Narelle Bell
Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]