Narelle Bell



----- Forwarded Message ----
From: Amanda Credaro <acredaro@...>
To: oztl_net@...
Sent: Wednesday, 24 January, 2007 12:28:38 PM
Subject: [OZTL_NET] HUMOR: VOCABULARY SPIN


The following was sent to me by a colleague - although there's no
attribution, it is too good not to pass on. Some of the below have been
around for a while, whilst others I haven't seen before. Enjoy! And thanks
to the many anonymous authors ....

------------------------------------------------------------------
For those who love the philosophy of hypocrisy and ambiguity....

1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad
girls live.

8. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

11. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered
plant?

14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

15. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will
clean them?

18. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to start
speaking?

19. Why do they put Braille signs well away from QR doors? How do blind
people find the signs?

20. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?

22. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.

23. Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?

25. How is it possible to have a civil war?

26. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?

27. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?

28. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

30. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?

31. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot them?

32. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

33. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become
disorientated?




------------------------------------------------------------------
Posted here by:

Amanda Credaro
Editor: WARRIOR LIBRARIAN WEEKLY (free)
http://www.warriorlibrarian.com

*********************************
Generally, the forwarding of email to a third party, without express and
prior consent (which if granted will be done so without any expectation of
financial or other gain), is a violation of Australian Telecommunication
Laws. Permission is hereby granted for THIS communication to be circulated
appropriately without obtaining prior consent, nor paying any fees or
charge. However, gratuities that are high in energy and low in nutritional
value are always most welcome.
*******************

_________________________________________________________________
Advertisement: Meet Sexy Singles Today @ Lavalife - Click here
http://a.ninemsn.com.au/b.aspx?URL=http%3A%2F%2Flavalife9%2Eninemsn%2Ecom%2Eau%2\
Fclickthru%2Fclickthru%2Eact%3Fid%3Dninemsn%26context%3Dan99%26locale%3Den%5FAU%\
26a%3D23769&_t=754951090&_r=endtext_lavalife_dec_meet&_m=EXT

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]